Recently I sat across from a woman I never met and allowed myself to be fully seen. This may sound strange to some of you but it was an exercise. I did not know her and she did not know me. But after 10 minutes she would know more about me than most people in my life.
We were asked to answer a series of questions. Some were easy to answer. Others were not. I felt vulnerable but safe. My walls came down and in that moment in my surrender and vulnerability, she saw me. Not the mother, the wife, the daughter or friend. But me.
We all have walls. They are built up over time to keep us safe and from allowing us to hurt to much. They become higher after pain, loss, heartbreak, disappointment, betrayal and trauma. They build up brick by brick. Sometimes we are so guarded behind the walls we create we can start to project onto others. We get angry, sad, bitter, judgmental and tough. We forget that under it all, before all the walls we bathed in love, joy and ease. Our natural state of being. And when we feel safe enough it shines through. When we start to break down the walls and the more we do to “unbuild” them the more love, joy and acceptance flows through.
To Heal we must Feel Quote by Tim Morrison
It got me thinking, imagine if we all held space for everyone we met in life, like she held space for me. If we could see them fully without judgment. If we could see past the stories we create, the judgments we pass, the projections we cast. The conditioning, the environment and our education that formed our opinions.
But just saw them, accepted them (whether they were conscious of their behavior or not) and while we gazed at them we saw ourselves reflected back. Whether it be good or bad, whether it was light or dark. I wonder if we realized that just by being alive we are all connected.
How different our lives may be?
And if the problems we think we have are really problems at all or perhaps they are opportunities to turn inward and take a closer look because love, joy and ease are begging to come back out?
*please note I’m not talking about destructive/abusive behavior of any kind. That is never ok.
The workshop I attended was Cacao Embrace